I feel like shit today. It's one of those days. Ugh. I feel fat and unattractive, and I feel like I have no life, THANK YOU BILL. Honestly sometimes I really don't have anything to do. I don't have a job cuz my parents gave me money so I wouldn't have to get one. I don't have homework, I don't have school. It's not that I don't have friends, Christina just left, Pam's in Ohio, Mara's in NYC, etc. I just don't know what to do at the moment. I mean, there's stuff I need to do, like write thank you notes, and take checks to the bank...practice flute. I think I will practice flute. I've gotta practice for tomorrow's gig too. But I still feel like I have no life. I think I should go to the gym today. Christina's such a bad influence on me, whenever she's here I eat like a frickin pig. Like usually, every morning, I have Slimfast drink...that's it, that's all I need, it fills me up. With Christina here this morning, I drink my Slimfast, then I had a few peanut butter crackers, then I had some Craisins, I think I had something else too, while she ate a veggie burger and crackers and talked about making a fruit and whipped cream sponge cake. I had to resist resist resist! AND she wanted to go to McDonalds for pancakes! UGH! What am I supposed to do, I don't have willpower that strong. Now I feel really really fat and I need to go to the gym. It's so hot and gross outside. Yech. And now it's raining outside. God what a horrid day. And all those quizzes that I took last night, I feel like a loser for taking them! Loser Loser Loser. Lara is a Loser. Jeezus. Okay, plan for today, practice flute, go to gym, write thank you notes, take checks to bank, go to counseling, feel better about self- report back tonight. Okay, will do